April 3, 2014
Tom Daley Proves There's No Such Thing as Bisexuals?
This morning when I rose, my news feeds and various social media timelines were full of Tom Daley stories. In case you missed it, Tom Daley, the Olympic diver who, some months ago, announced that he was bisexual and "still fancied the ladies" announced that he is now fully gay and not bisexual.
Many in the gay community have held onto the belief that bisexuality does not exist. These people believe that bisexuality is only a stepping stone for gays in denial of who they are. These people believe that, with time and understanding, these "bisexuals" will become comfortable enough to "admit" that they are, in fact, gay. It is their mantra that "There is no such thing as a true 'bisexual'."
Today; All of this, is at the expense of actual bisexuals. When we look at the very acronym for our community, I believe that
we forget that there is, in fact, a "B" in LGBT. And while people like Daley exist, I'd like us all to remember that Bisexuals do exist. Daley is only one (albeit of many) examples of men who may have been uncomfortable admitting that they were gay, but that's the joy of discovering who you are for yourself.
The problem is that there are a lot of gays who are so arrogant that they project their own life experience on every other curious male, attempting to rob them of their own personal journey. Many men start off as curious, find that they do have feelings for men, try things out, and eventually make it to the G (gay) umbrella. Some stop at B (bisexual), and some may even find that they don't fit in any of the labels. And that is OK.
The flack that Tom Daley has received for labeling himself bisexual "when everyone knows he's just gay" is ridiculous. Daley and other people in the youth of their coming out, need time to figure things out. What they don't need is someone mandating to them what is what and who is who, because everyone is different. If someone who says they're bisexual one day comes back and says that they're gay (as is the case with Daley) then congratulations, you told us so, but can you tell me the Power Ball numbers? On the flip side, if one maintains that he/she is bisexual, then accept it and stop trying to make people into what they are (yet) not.