Mar 26, 2014

Single, Sexy, Carefree: Hotstepper To Housewife/Husband

M4M cuddling Anime style.
In my trials and tribulations as a forty-something single black gay male, I’ve adopted the attitude that, “it gets greater later” and “forty is the new twenty”. Dating, for me, has been a roller coaster of goods, greats, bads, and worse. Through all of those events, I've still maintained my, “I owe it to me to be happy” and “Its all about me” mentality. Heck, the Pussycat Dolls “I Don’t Need A Man” has been my walking/stomping song.

PCD "I Dont Need A Man" still
In the imagined war between the singles and married/coupled/boo’d up I’ve always represented for the single, yet happy guy. “Love will find me, til then Imma live”.
 Moving casually from one dating adventure to the next has been a source of great experience for me. I learn from every interaction and value what I have learned. And still I remained the happy, single guy. Not bitter and single, happy and single.
Marvel Comics Wiccan and Hulkling
Enter the relationship. Duh,  duh,  duuuuhhhhhhh. Im in a new relationship and I’m asking myself has my single, sexy, carefree attitude caused me to be selfish, demanding, but still sexy (Lol)? Adjusting to a new dating situation is definitely not for the faint of heart. Words like Compromise, Communication, Caring, and Sharing (without the Care Bears) definitely come into play. The question becomes, after walking solo and standing strong, do those very traits become impediments to my step?

DC Comics Batwoman
Doing the work to become better to myself and better to my man comes first. I am definitely one of those folks who would love to have a realistic, yet fantastic and romantic relationship.  I look at relationships and friendships as seeds to plant and grow. Sometimes the bud withers but other times it grows into something amazing and beautiful.  The fact is , two people who love and care about each other definitely determines the outcome.

Each person’s pattern or plan for happiness is based upon his/her needs or wants. Indulging in the hook-up scene, maintaining chastity, being a serial dater, turning it out at Hunt's Pointe…it doesn't matter as long as you find happiness in whatever it is you’re doing, With those things being said, I suppose I will teach this old dog some new tricks and hang up my “Single Ladies” boots and retire into domesticity. Ill save the sexy for my guy though.
"Single Ladies" video still

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